Friday, May 24, 2024

Losing Keys

 


If you are a member of the human race, you have lost something; an item that it makes no sense that you should have misplaced.  That’s what I tell myself – I just misplaced it!  It happened yesterday.  I misplaced my pickup key, and I needed to find it quickly because Bret was coming within two hours to pick up the truck to get ready for a camping trip.  A couple of weeks ago Judy “misplaced” her coin purse which contained credit cards, driver’s license, insurance card and a bit of money. 

We recently read and discussed Tish Harison Warren’s book, “liturgy of the ordinary: sacred practices in everyday life”.  One of the chapters is about a very ordinary occurrence of losing keys, though the lesson applies to losing anything that makes you temporarily go nuts trying to find it, and what that has to do with the ups and downs of ordinary days and living faithfully.

Tish lists six stages of searching for lost objects:

Stage 1.  Logic.  I retrace steps in my mind. I look in the places that make sense.  I try to remain logical and rational, asking myself, where was the last place and time and I had my keys (or for Judy, her coin purse)

Stage 2.  Self-condemnation.  I begin to criticize myself under my breath – “How stupid!”  “Why am I so forgetful about things anymore?”  Good grief!!

Stage 3.  Vexation.  I get frustrated and panic a bit, starting to think of the consequences – “it will cost me a bunch of money to replace it”.  Or, having lost the credit cards, driver’s license, etc. – we say, “what a bother to replace and cancel”.  

Stage 4. Desperation.  I look everywhere, even the places that don’t make sense to have left them - checking and rechecking pockets!  If credit cards were actually stolen, it might already have been used and we could lose lots of money!  This is getting urgent!

Stage 5.  Last-ditch.  I stop and pray.  (Well maybe), but at least, sit down and breathe.  Calm down.  Tish tells of saying a prayer to St Anthony. 

Stage 6.  Despair – or resignation and accepting that the item is really lost.

We have another key for the pickup so I drove across town (in my car) to find a locksmith, to see if a duplicate can be quickly made.  It can but will cost $100 – which includes $50 for “reprograming” the key (not just an old-fashioned grinding one on a metal stem).  But “you have to bring the pickup to do that”.  So, back home to get the pickup (time is running short!), and when I got home, I made one last sweep through pockets and logical locations.  And Eurika!  I found the key in an illogical place, a drawer where I never put keys – How did it get there? 

In Judy’s case, we had cancelled and replaced all the cards and she obtained a new driver’s license.   Friends had mentioned the old adage “when you have done all the replacements, it is then that you will find it”, and lo and behold, yesterday afternoon, Judy happened to open a drawer where she never puts her purse, and Eurika! – there it was.  The lesson? Look in every drawer.  

I guess the last stage is one of relief and joy.  Though it does not always work out that we find the lost item, loss can teach lessons, whether we find the item or not. 

There were three parables told by Jesus in the Gospel of Luke about losing something valuable – the lost (prodigal) son, the lost sheep and the lost coin.  In each story four things happen - something is lost, there is a search, the lost is found and there is much joy.  Each story of loss ends with celebration.  The parable of the prodigal son is actually a story of two lost sons – the younger who squandered away his inheritance and the elder son who was resentful that the father received the younger son back and threw a party on his return.  Certainly, there is a lesson about reconciliation here as we consider any losses of relationships and lost opportunities in our lives.  There is redemption in the chance to accept and reconcile with those from whom we have distanced ourselves or who have lost their way. 

Several years ago, I lost something of great sentimental value – due to my own fault and lack of attention – a gold handled cane that had been passed down to me from my great grandfather, my grandfather and father to me.  Truly a family heirloom!  I never found it and have felt guilty about that ever since.  I did not have the opportunity to apologize and ask forgiveness from my father, grandfather or great grandfather – they are all gone.  I did tell my siblings I was sorry, and they do not hold any ill will toward me for my blunder.  Some relief there.

I am happy for having found these relatively insignificant items this week, and in the bigger scheme, that I have not lost the most important things in life – love of and from family, ability to appreciate nature, my health, and my faith.  My recent reading of the parables about lost things has reminded me again that I need to keep watchful of what is most important in life.   

What have you lost in your life?  Have you ever lost something that you would go to any lengths to find?